Sometimes dear God,
I see things from your viewpoint and I’m deeply saddened.
A friend lamented the other day and said ‘I wish we could be just a little kinder to God’ I couldn’t agree any less.
Sometimes I wish I could give you a tight hug
Not the one we do unto others as unto You
Just one for You
Because I know you have a heart too
One that’s deeply bleeding.
Just hug you and say nothing request nothing
Let you run those tears I know you have and often hide
Let’s not kid each other. I know parents often breakdown behind us then quickly resolve to keep fighting what more of you with all these children?
Children who are in a world of their own like rebellious hormone raging teenagers
We are sorry you know.
Still, if I could just let you feel warm embrace around you until all those emotions fall away like tremors leaving hope that it was temporary
Everything will stabilize and destruction isn’t permanent
I often lay up at night trying to sleep
Often it circles to You before getting distracted again I ask me
Did I make you a little happy yesterday? Today?
How do you run all those emotions at once?
Happy, Sad, Devastated, Ecstatic
I know you are God
But your reflection is in us
So just for a bit allow me to empathize especially in times of crisis
All-powerful and mighty we just assume
And imagine the only thing You are ever good for is judgment and a request deposit box
Do we have days when we give you breaks A day every often for zero request but our love to you and others around us
A day where my inner child imagines us running in a beautiful field with flowers, fruits nice sun, fresh air and tell stories, laughter, appreciating creation and happy tears.
Maybe we will come to a time where prayer isn’t some religious chant but us conversing without prompt or aids without which we feel prayer hasn’t happened
I hope it’s soon
Where we have no protocol just like we pop at family’s and close friends
Where we can be extremely honest about how we each feel and don’t need others to craft words for us.
Do we run to you because there’s suddenly no other option?
Or because you are the only option?
Maybe just in case, this is true and Heaven is a real option.
How about I’m with you because I chose toI’m being intentional and deliberate of my choice being with You.
Many times I look around and I want to cry for me
Yes valid tears because kid you not we both know these are not simple things
Then You show me the blessing hidden, You show me another thing and I see right through your love
Other times you outright play the ‘ distract her game with this as I sort her life and others’.
There’ll be times I’ll say this is it, I’m done let’s agreeAnd those times I just see right through You
Sometimes it is sad sometimes it’s happy other times, I just don’t know
And other times you reveal things and say things that paints a whole new meaning to knowing You.
Meaning that draws the neat line between knowing you and about you.
Then other times dear God,
I find there’s just never an end to knowing the depths of You
But one thing dear God I hope we can all be a little kinder to you I know it will spread through the universe but,
This once even though sometimes it seems the flesh is all gone and bone is all I have to pick with you let me embrace you and be about you expecting nothing in return.